Self Love

I recently listened to a podcast that has challenged me to change my thinking. The woman being interviewed was Karly Randolph Pitman who is the founder of First Ourselves. Karly talked about "7 Ways to Accept Your Body as it Ages." The entire podcast is worth listening to, but I was particularly struck by her comment about being sure we approach change out of self love.

According to Karly, when we see a need to make a change in our life, there are 2 ways we can think about that change. One way is the negative approach that is almost a form of self-abuse. Even something like exercise can be turned into a form of punishment - Look at me, I need to exercise to get rid of this disgusting weight. Karly says that vanity is a terrible short term motivator. Wanting to look good will not keep you exercising, eating right, and taking care of yourself because vanity is never satisfied. There will always be a better version of you to strive for. If you decide that there is something you want to change, do it out of self love (the 2nd and better approach) - I love my body and I want to care for it the best way I can.

While this sounds like common sense, it is not the way I approach change and I doubt many women approach weight loss out of self love. I believe that I am not too "down on myself" but I have to admit that my motivation for change rarely comes from a place of self love. This is especially true when it comes to my weight. I want to lose weight because I want to be thinner. I know that my self-esteem is significantly impacted by my weight and as a result, I try to keep it under control. Of course, when I lose weight, I feel good for a short time and then I begin to feel like I need to lose more weight.

I am challenged and encouraged by what I heard on this podcast, and I plan to explore Karly's website and resources. I also want to share these resources with you. I realize that learning to accept my body as it ages, be kind to my body and treat myself with love will take time and practice, but I am excited to get started on this journey.

The podcast I heard is from Vicky and Jen. They produce a podcast called "What Really Matters." I love their show and I hope you will check it out.
Vicky and Jen's website - http://vickyandjen.com
The podcast on Self Love - http://vickyandjen.com/podcast_169.html
Vicky and Jen in iTunes - http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/what-really-matters/id201098170

Karly's website, First Ourselves - http://www.firstourselves.org

The information below is from Karly Randolph Pitman and is quoted from the Vicky and Jen website.
(http://vickyandjen.com/podcast_169.html)

7 Ways to Accept Your Body as it Ages
By Karly Randolph Pitman
 1. Mourning / Celebrating Losses. Honor and celebrate what you had. Necessary losses. Grieve what you’ve lost. It hurts to watch our bodies age and lose their beauty.
2. Integrity / Honesty. We feel more beautiful when we are taking care of ourselves. Beauty has a high connecotion to integrity – to living out our values. (We say we love ourselves, but then we do otherwise – i.e., skimp on sleep, exercise, healthy food or overexercise, diet, etc.) Honor your commitments to your body.
3. Compassion / Non-violence. Drop comparisons. Comparisons are cruel. This includes comparing yourself to yourself, to a younger, prettier, thinner, better version of yourself.
4. Acceptance. Accept what you can’t change. Change what you can. Have the wisdom to know the difference. Use love as motivation to change rather than vanity.
5. Know your true nature. Attach your self-worth to something other than your body. It’s a recipe for hurt and pain.
6. Gratitude. Appreciate what your body can do to take the focus on how it looks. Try something new. Expand your idea of what is possible.

7. Authenticity. Adopt your own beauty standards. As we age, we are more comfortable being ourselves - and being ourselves in our bodies. Use jealousy as a way of uncovering how you are inauthentic.


4 Ways to Be Kind to Our Bodies
Body hatred manifests in our lives as harsh expectations, stringent guidelines and general meanness: asking too much from our bodies, and then criticizing them when they fall short. Who wants that? The antidote to body hatred is gentleness: relaxing our expectations so that we can meet our need for a beautiful, healthy body without living with an internal slavedriver.
How can we be more gentle towards our bodies? Here are 4 suggestions:
1. Wear clothes that fit. One of the easiest ways you can feel fat, like you need to lose weight, and generally ruin your day is by squeezing into clothes that are too small. Would you ever do this to a child? Of course not. So why do this to yourself? Because wearing a smaller size makes us feel thinner. Likewise, we think that wearing a smaller size will make us look thinner. But the reverse is true. Well dressed women agree that wearing clothes that skim, rather than cling to the body, creates the most flattering silhouette: good for your body as well as your self esteem.
2. Give yourself time for changes to manifest. Whether you’re a new mother trying to lose her baby weight, or you’re trying to lose your winter hibernation pounds, be kind to your body, and give yourself enough time to reach your goal. Expecting changes overnight, or in a week, or even in a month, result in drastic measures and frustration. Either you’ll kill yourself to meet your goal, or you’ll give up and berate yourself for your lack of progress. Habits take 3 weeks to take; mindsets, over a year. So give it time.
3. Accept a range for an ideal weight, rather than one number. Health is dynamic, an ever changing, living, breathing thing. You can’t expect your body to be constant. Weight fluctuates, especially in women’s bodies. Health fluctuates, as your external circumstances change. The appearance of your skin and hair fluctuates with the seasons and your health. Instead of accepting one weight as your ideal, give yourself a range of at least 6 pounds to accommodate the normal flux of living. Instead of having one definition of a good hair or skin day, increase your options to include a day when you have a small pimple or when your hair doesn’t cooperate perfectly.
4. Accept fat days without shame and criticism. Yes, in an ideal world, every woman would love her body all of the time. But what if you don’t love your body everyday? Let it go, and give yourself a break. Maybe you’re tired. Maybe you’ve got PMS. Maybe you’re tired of winter and sweaters and are longing for spring. Accept that while, yes, your goal is to love your body, there may be times when you don’t. And that’s okay.

Healthy Recipes

Most people would like to improve their eating habits, but don't have time to devote to a total menu make-over. This will certainly take some planning. Check out my post on meal planning for more on the topic of planning your meals. After you get into the habit of making a plan for healthy meals, recipes become the next hurdle.

There are three basic ways to get healthy foods onto your menu: using recipes, making your own creations, or modifying recipes will all help you incorporate healthy foods into your diet.

Recipes:
Although I still have a few, recipe books are quickly becoming a thing of the past. Every recipe you could ever hope to find is on the Internet. I rely on the Internet quite a bit when I am cooking. In fact, all of my Thanksgiving and Christmas cooking was done from recipes I found on the Internet. Recipe books are useful for specialized foods. I rely heavily on a book called The Miami Mediterranean Diet. This book is about incorporating Mediterranean cooking into your diet and is filled with great recipes.

Making your own creations:
Some people are really good at this, but I am not. Put me in a kitchen with a pile of ingredients, and I need Google to help me make use of them in a creative and edible recipe. My lack of talent in this area is exactly why I bought the book on Mediterranean cooking mentioned above. I knew that I should be incorporating certain foods into my diet, but I did not know how. If you are one of the talented or adventurous individuals who can create meals from a list of ingredients, I envy you. Making your own creations also takes time and practice. There are tons of food blogs on the Internet that tell the stories of people who create their own recipes, and I choose to rely on them instead of my own creations (at least for now).

Modifying Recipes:
This is one of my favorite methods of incorporating healthy food into my family's menu. Most mom's learn to modify recipes out of desperation. How else can we get our children to eat vegetables? I also modify recipes because I want my family eating whole grains, ground flax, and less sugar.

How do I make all of this work in my kitchen?
One weekend, I found myself craving pumpkin muffins. I remembered that I had once made some really good/healthy pumpkin muffins several years ago but had no idea where I would find that recipe (it might have been on the back of the label on the can). I typed "whole wheat pumpkin muffins" into the search box and the fourth entry listed in the results was for whole wheat pumpkin muffins with cranberries and walnuts. This recipe is on a terrific blog called Pinch My Salt. I reviewed the recipe and decided it was perfect for me. I had all of the necessary ingredients or knew I could make adequate substitutions and the ingredient list met with my nutritional goals. I did make some modifications to the recipe, but the basic foundation belongs to the talented chef/blogger at Pinch My Salt. When people ask me for the recipe for my muffins, I give out the link to the blog. I thought I would take the time to walk people through how I modified the recipe. I am putting the exact recipe below. The original can be found at the blog Pinch My Salt.  I will note my changes in parentheses.

Whole Wheat Pumpkin Muffins with Cranberries and Walnuts
2 1/2 C. whole wheat flour (I use 2C Wheat Flour, 1/4C Ground Flax, 1/4C Wheat Germ)
2 t. baking powder
1 t. baking soda
1/2 t. salt
2 1/2 t. pumpkin pie spice (I don't have pumpkin pie spice so I use 1 1/2t ground cinnamon, 1/2t ground nutmeg, 1/4t ground cloves, 1/2t ground ginger)
1 C. pumpkin puree (I use canned)
2 T. oil
3/4 C. honey (I use 1 1/4C Splenda + 1/4C water)
2 eggs
2/3 C. buttermilk (I use the powdered substitute that is available in any grocery store)
1 t. vanilla
1/2 C. sweetened dried cranberries (like Craisins)
1/2 C. chopped walnuts
1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Lightly grease a standard size 12 cup muffin tin (I use cooking spray).
2. In a large bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, and pumpkin pie spice; set aside.
3. In a separate bowl, whisk together pumpkin, oil, honey, eggs, buttermilk and vanilla.
4. Pour wet ingredients into dry ingredients and stir together until just combined. Fold in the cranberries and walnuts.
5. Divide batter evenly between 12 standard sized muffin cups. Bake 20-23 minutes in a preheated 375 degree oven. Muffins are done when they spring back lightly to the touch or when a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.

Give it a try, add some healthy ingredients to your favorite recipes or find a new recipe. Please share what you do to add healthy food to your diet in the comments.

How About those Routines?

In my last post, I wrote about returning to routines after having them disrupted. In my case, we were just ending winter break. I am 2 weeks into my "regular routine" and some things are going well while some things are not going so well.

What's going well?

• We are eating healthy meals and the meal planning routine seems to be back to normal.
• I have added a new exercise routine and that has been going well.
• I am trying to change my evening routines and that seems to be going well for me and my family. (I hope to write about this soon.)
• Laundry is getting done. Having a plan in place has made that easy.
• I have been working with my daughter to study for some big tests. I had not planned on this, but we are working on making a study plan as we go.
• I am making time to read everyday.
• My children have embraced the idea of turning off the TV, and that has become a new part of our weekends and evenings.

What's not going so well?

• There are still some Christmas decorations out (they are going in the box today).
• We are having trouble getting back to our evening routines that involve picking up around the house.
• I have not had time to write or research for my blog. It seems this routine has disappeared all together.

All in all, I feel fairly successful with our return to "normal" and I feel as if I am able to deal with the areas that are not going well. I can live with the fact that the house is not as clean as I would like because I know we can get back to keeping it clean. I am also aware of the fact that we have added some new routines to our life that will need some time to get settled into.

Preparing to Return to "Normal"

This is it. Today is the last day of my winter break. I return to work and my children return to school tomorrow. Yesterday (Jan 1) was a lazy day. I worked on my scrapbooks, did one load of laundry (see Managing Laundry) planned the meals (see meal planning) for this coming week, and read. How am I going to get my family ready for the coming week and still enjoy my last day of break? A little planning and a little letting go (see Keeping Routines During Non-Routine Times) are my strategies.

Planning:

• As I have planned, the holiday leftovers are gone from the house and we are returning to more healthy eating starting today. All of our bodies will be thankful for that. I have even planned what I will eat for my 3 meals and snacks today.
• I have a plan for the 3 meals I plan to cook today that we will eat next week (see Meal Planning). It is just past 8:00 a.m. and I have already cooked the first meal for next week (chili made with veggies and turkey). I used the food processor (new gift) and had it on the stove while the coffee was brewing. 
• I have written down what each person in my family needs to accomplish today. For me, it includes exercising , scrapbooking and reading along with the chores that need to get done (see Planning your Free Time). 
• We are all going to take time today to make a plan for next week. This will help us return to our routines and not be stressed out.

Letting Go:

• The Christmas tree is still up and the living room is still decorated. That is just going to have to be OK. We have agreed to take it down next weekend when we will have more time.
• I do not plan to do any house cleaning today. The house was just cleaned the other day for an event we hosted, and is in good enough shape to get us into the week. 
• I had hoped to spend time cleaning out my bedroom this break, but I did not get to finish that project. I will work it into my future plans instead of spending today getting my room finished.
• I will only do one load of laundry today. My laundry system only requires that I wash one load per day. It is tempting to wash an extra load, but that would keep me from getting to the other things on my list.  

Wish me luck! I am finished with my morning coffee now (a routine I can never let go) and I am going to exercise. I know what I plan to accomplish today and I hope I get to everything on my list. Are you using planning to get things accomplished? Tell us about your ideas, successes and/or challenges in the comment area below.

Keeping Your Routines During Non-Routine Times

There are plenty of times when we find it impossible to keep up with our already established routines. Vacations, snow days, holidays, major life events and having guests are just a few of the times when our routines seem to disappear. What can we do to save ourselves from a permanent lapse of routine while making the most of our relaxation time (if any)?

I have learned to rely on 2 strategies: let go and plan. I know that sounds like a contradiction, but give me a chance to explain myself.

Let Go:
Sometimes, we can't keep all of our routines flowing along perfectly. I am currently in the middle of winter break for my kids and myself (2 weeks) and holiday break for my husband (1 week). During this time, we have had two Christmas parties, Christmas Eve, Christmas day, a snow day, friends over for dinner, and friends over for day-long play dates with the kids. In addition, we have several events in the coming days, including New Year's Eve. As you can guess, I have had to let go of several routines and/or standards along the way. Sure, there are things that I will not "let go," but I have given it some thought and I know what I can and can not let go of. Examples:

• My kids have not taken as many baths as I would have liked, but they are brushing their teeth at night and their rooms get regular daily cleanings (even more than typical).
• Holiday meals and desserts are delicious but not always healthy. I make sure the family gets healthy food throughout the day even if not at every meal. Also, we are ALL exercising (even my 5 year old thanks to Wii Fit).
• My kids are spending more time playing video games, playing on the computer, and watching TV/movies than I like, but they are also spending time reading everyday and some of their computer time is directed towards educational games.
• I have not been doing laundry, but I am making it a priority to have my work clothes ready for the end of my break.

If possible, give this some thought before your next routine busting event. Will you enforce all of your nutrition rules during your next trip? When your kids are home from school, will you really spend everyday cleaning up the house or will some things wait until tomorrow? Better yet, develop a plan to help manage all of the routine changes. This brings me to my other important step.

Plan:
As with anything, planning will help you be more successful. Yes, I do let go of some things, but other things need to get done, and when my routine is disrupted, I need a plan to help me get it all done. I also need to write that plan down and refer to it during the day. It is the only way I will manage to get everything done. There are three areas I like to plan for:

1. What needs to get done today? I plan for the chores I need to accomplish, the free-time activities I hope to enjoy and the meals I plan to eat. This may sound like a lot, but it is usually just a list of words on my planning whiteboard. (See Planning Free Time post.)
2. Who can help me? The times when my routine is disrupted (like now) usually involve having other people home with me. When I evaluate all of the things that need to get done, I always delegate the jobs that can be delegated. Right now, there are 4 people enjoying a holiday break in my home. We all chip in to get things done around the house. For example, both of my girls are good with the vacuum, so I rarely do any vacuuming myself.
3. How will I get back to our routines? Weather you are returning from a trip, settling down after a holiday or recovering from a major event or project, you need to know how you will ease back into your routines. As we look at the end of our holiday break, I am thinking about the following: when will the house be returned to normal (decorations put away), when will the holiday food be banished from the house,  and what needs to be done before the kids return to school and mom and dad return to work.

The next time you are facing (or in the middle of) a routine busting event, try to let go of some things and jot down what you absolutely need to get done. Hopefully you will feel that you have more control, find more time to relax, and enjoy yourself a bit more than usual.

Use the comment option to share how you get through routine busting events. Tell us what you are willing to let go of and what you absolutely refuse to compromise on.

Meal Planning

Whether you are looking to improve your health, cut costs, or save money, planning your meals is one step you should start taking. Time management, healthy eating and saving money are all topics that deserve their own articles, but planning your meals helps in all three of these areas, and I will touch on each.

Before you brush this idea off, let me assure you that you have time to do this and that it will be worth your while. I started planning our meals when I wanted to improve our eating habits. I wanted to make sure that my family was eating the most healthy meals possible, and that required planning. Any change requires planning.

Since I am already way to busy, and could not imagine making time to plan meals (you are probably thinking the same thing). I started bringing my meal planning tools (book of Mediterranean recipes, pen, notebook, grocery list) to my daughter's soccer game. We always have to arrive 30 minutes early so the girls can warm up, so I would set up my chair and plan my meals. I would also make use of half time for planning. I would then complete my grocery shopping later in the day.

There are a few things that I did to help the planning process be more smooth for me. My goal was to change our eating habits, so I was relying on a recipe book to bring new ideas to my menu planning.  First, I went through the recipe book and wrote the names of recipes I knew my family would eat in a notebook. I included the page number with each recipe on the list so I could easily find the recipe later. When I was ready to plan for a week, I would choose 3-5 recipes to cook. Then I would list the ingredients I needed to purchase on my grocery list. After eating the recipe, if it was worth repeating in the future, I added it to a list of approved recipes that I keep on the side of my fridge.

First, some basic thoughts on getting started with meal planning.

-You should start your own list of master recipes. It will help you when you need some inspiration. Unless you are in need of a complete mealtime overhaul, you probably have at least three favorites that you rely on. What are those meals and what are the ingredients you need to put those meals together? Those should be the first items on your list. Keep those ingredients in the house at all times so you always have a meal in a pinch. Next, brainstorm a list of meals you have cooked (and enjoyed) in the past. Listing the necessary ingredients for each meal is also helpful, but you can manage without this step if you prefer.

-Be realistic about your ability to prepare meals. Don't set yourself up for failure. Consider the number of ingredients and the prep time necessary before you put a recipe on the list. Also be careful not to plan on meals that require specialized ingredients.

-Plan all of your meals: breakfast, lunch and dinner plus snacks.

-Sometimes less is more. Do you really need 7 dinners to get through the week or will you be able to eat some of your meals more than once in a week? My family can usually get 2 meals out of a lasagna and still have some left over for lunch or a leftovers dinner. Will your family really be having 7 meals this week? Is there a night when part of the family will be out? We have soccer practice night in my house and we have to eat on the run so we pack a portable dinner instead of trying to get home to eat. Before you decide you need to actually cook 7 full meals, be sure you will actually eat all of those meals.

-Make sure you write things down! Don't expect that you will remember that you want to try a new recipe on page 157 of your new cookbook on Wednesday. You might find that you are running late after a crazy day at work on Wednesday, and suddenly you are standing in your kitchen without any idea of what to cook for dinner. Jot down your meal plans and be sure to jot down the ideas that you find successful.

How can planning your meals help with time management, improving your health, and saving money?

Any type of planning will help with time management. I personally have experienced a number of benefits. First, simply knowing what I will be serving has made all the difference in the world. It makes my evenings far less stressful than they have been in the past. My grocery shopping is also way more efficient. I know exactly what I need, so there is no wandering through the store hoping to be inspired. I try to write my list in a way that groups like items, so I am way more efficient in the store and spend less time returning to isles for Items I forgot. I am also better able to delegate dinner plans to my husband. If I know what we are having for dinner, I can have him prepare the dinner or get it started. Finally, since I plan out my meals, I am also able to cook meals in advance. Now that I know exactly what I am going to be making for the week, I find that preparing several meals at once (usually on the weekend) saves me a lot of time. When I have all the veggies out and do all of the chopping at once, it is very efficient.

Planning your meals is the first step to improving your health. Most people make poor choices when they find themselves hungry and without a plan. Opening the refridgerator and not knowing what you will take out is just asking for trouble. Planning your meals can also help you develop better eating habits. If you plan out what you are going to eat, you are more likely to get all the necessary servings of fruits and vegetables. This is also a great opportunity to make adjustments to your diet. Perhaps you want to eat a more heart healthy diet or you want to cut calories, planning will help you be successful in making any changes. Start small, try to add one healthy, new recipe to your meals each week.

When I started planning my meals, I was looking to improve the eating habits of my family. What I discovered was that I was also saving money. If saving money is your primary goal, planning your meals is a must. In most cases, you will want to plan your meals around sales and seasonal produce. One primary benefit for me was that I only buy what I need and I waste less food. I try to plan meals that require like ingredients. If I only need half an onion for a recipe, I check to be sure I can use the other half in another recipe.

So, give it a try. Just start planning your meals. Take one small step towards routinely planning all of your meals. Maybe begin by planning your meals for tomorrow. Then, after you celebrate your success, think about how to customize meal planning to fit your life. I tend to keep a bad with me on the weekends. This bag has my favorite recipe books, a spiral notebook where I have listed all of the recipes I like, pens,and  post-it note. Set yourself up to be successful with meal planning.

Planning Your Free Time

I know...Isn't that an oxymoron?
Actually, planning your free time will help you have more free time. That is why I got started on this aspect of improving my life. I work a full-time job outside of my home and in the past,  I have been in survival mode all week and then I have to spend my weekend in clean-up mode. I did not have time to do any of the things I wanted to do (including writing). To be honest, I was barely surviving. I had (and still have) a lot of things that needed to get under control. My main problem was a lack of systems to keep all of the balls that I juggle in the air. I was dropping a LOT of balls. How could I get all of the areas of my life that needed time in order and then find time for the things I wanted to do? Scheduling.

First, I realized that I needed a plan for maintaining the positive changes I was working to create (like my new laundry system). Second, I realized that my family needed to be a part of the maintenance plan so they needed a plan also. I thought about this for a few weeks. During those few weeks, I paid close attention to what types of things each family member needed to do, what types of organization we were already using, and what types of organization we could add.

This organizing system to help me plan my family's free time is a work in progress, but I am starting to cross this river one stepping stone at a time instead of waiting for all of the details to be worked out. As you know, starting is the most important step you can take.

Here is what I came up with:

1. Each person has a dry-erase board for weekly planning. We use these to make notes about our week. 
2. My daughters have paper calendars for long-term planning. I use a digital calendar.
3. My daughters have nightly checklists that they review to know what they need to do.
4. There is a large dry-erase board in the kitchen for general notes.
5. The freezer (top of fridge) is a designated grocery/food list space that has organized lists.

1. Personal dry-erase boards (mine are homemade) for weekly planning: Each person has a board. I labeled them with the days of the week and used a Sharpie to divide the board into sections. We use dry-erase pens and/or stickie notes to make notes on the board.

I use mine to note when I plan to exercise and to keep my running to-do lists. I use a digital personal planning program on my iPad for a majority of my organizing needs, but this board is for the reminders that I need to see when I am at home and the planner is put away. I also do a majority of my meal planning on this board. I write myself reminders of what I plan to eat. This helps me when I arrive home from work starving and I can not remember what the plan for dinner was. I plan to use this board for scheduling my evening time as well. My goal is to schedule time for reading, blog research, writing, and other things I want to accomplish.

My oldest daughter is in middle school.  Her board is for reminders like: pack soccer bag, practice guitar, bring baked goods to school for bake sale. I let her manage this planning. I expect her to practice her guitar 5X a week. She gets to schedule those five times around her schedule in a way that suits her.

My youngest daughter (5 yrs) has little cut outs for her chart. She helped to make her chart, but I told her what had to go on the chart. I also add things to the chart for her.

Items on her chart are daily things like picking out clothes, unpacking her lunchbox, brushing teeth, and taking a bath. Other items are weekly reminders like remembering to pack her item for show and share. I also add notes about chores I want her to complete (Tues. pick up barbies in playroom). This chart serves as my reminder, for my husband and me, of the routines we want my daughter to develop as well as a reminder for her. By making this chart for her and child-friendly, I can gradually release the responsibility of these routines to her. In fact, we are already asking her to check her chart each evening to see what needs to be done.

2. Paper calendars for long-term planning are now in place for my daughters. Until now, I have been the keeper of the calendar because my calendar needs to be digital. Now, each of my children have a calendar. My older daughter uses her calendar to write soccer games and practices, school events, tests and due dates for projects. She is responsible for keeping this calendar but she is also responsible for reporting any important dates for school to me. She will tell me when she has a test or a project due and then tell me what her plan is to study or complete the project. Keeping this calendar helps her be organized, but it is also helping her see the connection between the planning and the events in her life.

My younger daughter's calendar is mostly about helping her understand the passage of time. When the weekend is coming, when school starts, and when Christmas will finally come are all important questions in the life of a 5 year old. In the future, I will write more events on her calendar, but her soccer team is on the off-season right now, so there is not a lot to write.

3. Nightly checklists for daily maintenance chores. Each of my daughters had nightly chores that they must complete. These chores are mostly so they can manage their own belongings. These lists are simply written on small pieces of paper and taped near the charts. The lists are subject to change at any time. We can read these off before the TV watching begins to make sure nightly chores get done.

The 5 year old's list:

1. Shoes away

2. Empty homework folder

3. Dirty clothes in basket

4. Toys away

5. Dirty dishes in sink

6. Dust (3x week)

7. Pick up trash

The 11 year old's list:

1. Study plan

2. Shoes away

3. Jackets away

4. Sweep 1 floor area

5. Dirty dishes away

6. Practice instrument (when no soccer practice)

4. There is a large dry-erase board in the kitchen for general notes. I need to write notes for reminders of all kinds and I am hoping to get my family into this habit also. I do not have a specific plan for this board, but I write things and stick post-it notes on it as reminders. I originally planned for it to be smaller, but I knew my younger daughter would want to write on it, so I left space. 

5. The freezer is now the designated place to organize food needs. There are 3 pieces of paper at all times. 1 list for the regular grocery store, 1 list for Sam's club, and 1 list of left-overs in containers in the refrigerator.  We are pretty good about adding items to the grocery list. I have even trained my oldest daughter to add items to the list. I just needed the process to be more organized. 

These systems are not perfect, but they are a start and they will continue to get better. For me, it helps to have our routines written down so we manage to get everything done each evening. For my daughters, it is putting them in charge of their own routines. Like my laundry system, this is giving me peace of mind because I know that the things that need to get done are at least written down in a central location.

What will my next steps be? I really want to get more specific about scheduling my evening time. For example, my goal is to spend from 8-9 pm working on the things I mentioned above (reading, research, writing). Also, come February, soccer season will be in full swing again. I will need to be extra careful about planning our evening time since soccer practice will take up so many evenings.